Sunday, December 29, 2013

Day 2807: Reflections on 2013

I have talked to several people about my struggle to decide between family medicine or urology and, it's actually been to most of you so, I won't bore you with any of the details. Instead, I will give you the highlights. Can I handle the five-year residency that urology entails? Do I want to be a surgeon? Will urology provide me with the work-life balance I need? Lots of questions, with not many answers. Hopefully I can find some in the next two months before I have to submit my schedule for next year.

Family things have calmed down a bit, but everything isn't "back to normal," whatever normal looks like. I think it will keep taking time, on everyone's part, to find some true peace. Gosh I sound so much more touchy-feely than I mean to. Anyway, my maternal grandmother (Ama) is coming back to the states in February 2014. managed to get some time off to fly back to California to see her so I am super pumped about that. This woman played a huge role in raising me, and I can't wait to see her.

I feel very grateful to have made it more than halfway through my medical schooling. The first two years were a challenge, to say the least. The breadth of knowledge expected of me month after month was exhausting. Preparing for Step 1 was one of the most stress-inducing times of my life. I learned a lot about myself during that period and I am taking that knowledge in to Step 2 CK and CS (my final two board exams in medical school to obtain my MD). The hospital, the clinics, interacting with patients is where I am most comfortable. I work well with others and I like talking to people (do not confuse this with my dislike of people. That is still the case.). I am finally where I need to be to succeed in this hell-hole (only half-kidding) that is med school.

I have a beautiful second family here in Milwaukee courtesy of Danny and his family. I feel incredibly lucky to have such a supportive partner and as supportive a family as his. I am sure that I would not have been able to handle the stress of medical school without his and his family's unending support. Now is the time to hashtag things like #lucky and #blessed.

OH MY GOSH. New calendar years make me so touchy-feely.