Hey there.
Psych on Tuesday was somewhat of a complete hydrogen bomb of badness. I went in, made a bunch of educated guesses, and when my score popped up after the exam, I swear to you, I had to hold in a yelp of disbelief. I have no idea where I went so wrong. ...let me back up. I only studied the 7 lectures of psych on Monday since I had more important things to study for (neuro pathology on Wednesday). So, my grade is completely justified. However, that score stressed me out beyond belief. It also pissed me off to no end. Therefore, I used those two emotions to study my butt off for neuro-path the next day.
The next day, Wednesday, 9 am, neuro-path. For those of you that have memories like elephants, neuroscience was a subject I took last spring semester (aka this time last year). I failed my first exam. It was pretty debilitating and it was probably the umpteenth time my sister/mother heard me bawl on the phone about my apparent lack of intelligence and self-defeating doubt concerning my place in medical school. Well, I got my act extremely together that semester and ended neuroscience with a solid pass. Back to pathology, that test was a mind-swirl. I was between 2-3 answers (out of 5) on about 15 questions. I thought it out, wrote a bunch of stuff out and made educated guesses. Since we all saw how well that turned out on psych the previous day, you can imagine my stress levels going through the roof. Well, I got a 92 on that exam.
I should be cheering. Instead, I am blogging, trying to figure out why I can't revel in that obvious win. Did psych really screw with my mind that bad that I can't even believe in my abilities? I have been so screwed up the past few weeks. Family life is stressful. (Apparently both of my parents think all I do is nothing but have tons of fun, and they chastize me for it. If only I could physically demonstrate and properly verbalize the amount I study/my stress levels to them. Then maybe they would leave me the hell alone, or I don't know, believe in me.) My sister is the only sane one left. I am constantly, overwhelmingly stressed out by the prospect of boards every waking second. I have a lot on my mind all the time and I have a lot of negative energy and bad ju-ju I need to let go of. I want to do urology so bad. I have never wanted anything more in my entire life.
Speaking of urology, I shadowed the residency director here at school after my exam and it was jaw-droppingly amazing. He created a new bladder. Ta-da! The patient had bladder cancer so the cancer doc took out the bladder, and the urology doc created a new one from the small intestine. Then he inserted the ureters and urethra and ta-da, a new bladder was born. It felt a lot of sewing/seamstress-ing which we all know I do a lot of. It was so freaking cool. I nearly fell off my step-stool at how much fun it was, and I was only watching. Can you tell I am in love with this specialty? (I know, I know, I owe you all a "why urology?" post. Coming soon. I promise/hope.)
Hopefully this post compensates for my utter lack of posting in February thus far. I keep promising pictures, but I truly promise that my next post will be pictures. There is nothing I hate more than broken promises.
Showing posts with label shadowing. Show all posts
Showing posts with label shadowing. Show all posts
Thursday, February 21, 2013
Monday, May 7, 2012
Day 1897: The last shadow...ing.
Oh hi. This is way belated.
However. I wanted to talk about my last shadowing session.
As a review, the mentor that my medical assigned me is an ophthalmologist. It was the usual shadowing session -- lots of wet/dry macular degeneration (macular degeneration is when the center part of your vision (where you see most everything) begins to deteriorate. The difference between wet and dry is, wet means you develop new blood vessels in that area which hurts your vision more. With dry macular degeneration, that means you are developing things under a layer of cells and the only thing to do with dry macular degeneration is to prevent it from becoming "wet"). However, there were some cool interesting cases but all in all, a pretty standard day.
My mentor and I chit-chatted at the end of the session and she asked if she had convinced me to go into ophthalmology. I told her I find it interesting and her lifestyle seems like a good deal but I was still unsure. Then she asked about my summer plans and I told her about an upcoming family vacation (I know, I know, I haven't told any of you about it yet), a possible externship I am applying for (basically a paid internship away from my medical school) and anything not research related. She was very nice and supportive but told me that if I did ever get truly interested in ophthalmology, I should do research. "Ophthalmology is a competitive field and it will give you an edge."
... uh... thanks? Can someone explain to me, how is it that if 100 (out of 200) of my peers are doing research, that me doing research will somehow give me an edge? Either way, I have my post-undergrad research and if anything ever comes of it (hard to say if a paper with my name will ever arise, to be frank), then all the power to me. If not, I'm going to be a doctor either way so I'm not terribly worried about whether or not I have research on my resume/CV.
However. I wanted to talk about my last shadowing session.
As a review, the mentor that my medical assigned me is an ophthalmologist. It was the usual shadowing session -- lots of wet/dry macular degeneration (macular degeneration is when the center part of your vision (where you see most everything) begins to deteriorate. The difference between wet and dry is, wet means you develop new blood vessels in that area which hurts your vision more. With dry macular degeneration, that means you are developing things under a layer of cells and the only thing to do with dry macular degeneration is to prevent it from becoming "wet"). However, there were some cool interesting cases but all in all, a pretty standard day.
My mentor and I chit-chatted at the end of the session and she asked if she had convinced me to go into ophthalmology. I told her I find it interesting and her lifestyle seems like a good deal but I was still unsure. Then she asked about my summer plans and I told her about an upcoming family vacation (I know, I know, I haven't told any of you about it yet), a possible externship I am applying for (basically a paid internship away from my medical school) and anything not research related. She was very nice and supportive but told me that if I did ever get truly interested in ophthalmology, I should do research. "Ophthalmology is a competitive field and it will give you an edge."
... uh... thanks? Can someone explain to me, how is it that if 100 (out of 200) of my peers are doing research, that me doing research will somehow give me an edge? Either way, I have my post-undergrad research and if anything ever comes of it (hard to say if a paper with my name will ever arise, to be frank), then all the power to me. If not, I'm going to be a doctor either way so I'm not terribly worried about whether or not I have research on my resume/CV.
Sunday, April 1, 2012
Day 1861: Happy April Fool's!
Darling Jess, thanks for the push to update, haha.
My roommate's parents are currently in the living room hanging out with my roommate so I can't really study. Thus, a blog post.
WARNING. This will be a long post. Try to keep up ;)
Shadowing: My mentor is an ophthalmologist. The different between an ophthalmologist and an optometrist (who both look at eyes), is that my mentor can perform (laser) surgery. Being an ophthalmologist doesn't seem too strenuous, which could be good later in life. However, one of the most surprising things to me regarding the patient population is how common diabetes is in her patients. Diabetes, so what? Well, she stresses the need for her patients to take care of their blood sugar because diabetes can cause increased pressure on your eyes and you can imagine the bad effect that can have. Overall, it's been a really great experience thus far. My mentor is great and I am really enjoying the clinical exposure!
School: Le snooze. The schedule for the last two blocks is much easier than it has been. I am really not enjoying school lately because I understand the material and feel all smart and crap when I learn, but it is painfully obvious that I am a terrible test taker. I doubt my gut or I think too much about the question or, worst of all, I rationalize myself into the wrong answer. I know none of you ever respond, which is fine, but I am asking sincerely for any input you all have about test-taking. No joke, I got five questions wrong on my last physiology exam because I changed my answer from the right one to the wrong one. UGH!
In other news, I am taking a Spanish medical course. It's a completely voluntary thing. I have class twice a week, 90 minutes each, and I learn more medically-oriented things in Spanish. So, things like vocabulary and learning how to conduct a medical interview in Spanish. It's pretty sweet. And I'm enjoying it a lot. I forgot how much I miss Spanish.
Okay! The roommate (and her parents) have left! TIME TO FINALLY GET STUDYING!
Talk soon! PROMISE.
My roommate's parents are currently in the living room hanging out with my roommate so I can't really study. Thus, a blog post.
WARNING. This will be a long post. Try to keep up ;)
Shadowing: My mentor is an ophthalmologist. The different between an ophthalmologist and an optometrist (who both look at eyes), is that my mentor can perform (laser) surgery. Being an ophthalmologist doesn't seem too strenuous, which could be good later in life. However, one of the most surprising things to me regarding the patient population is how common diabetes is in her patients. Diabetes, so what? Well, she stresses the need for her patients to take care of their blood sugar because diabetes can cause increased pressure on your eyes and you can imagine the bad effect that can have. Overall, it's been a really great experience thus far. My mentor is great and I am really enjoying the clinical exposure!
School: Le snooze. The schedule for the last two blocks is much easier than it has been. I am really not enjoying school lately because I understand the material and feel all smart and crap when I learn, but it is painfully obvious that I am a terrible test taker. I doubt my gut or I think too much about the question or, worst of all, I rationalize myself into the wrong answer. I know none of you ever respond, which is fine, but I am asking sincerely for any input you all have about test-taking. No joke, I got five questions wrong on my last physiology exam because I changed my answer from the right one to the wrong one. UGH!
In other news, I am taking a Spanish medical course. It's a completely voluntary thing. I have class twice a week, 90 minutes each, and I learn more medically-oriented things in Spanish. So, things like vocabulary and learning how to conduct a medical interview in Spanish. It's pretty sweet. And I'm enjoying it a lot. I forgot how much I miss Spanish.
Okay! The roommate (and her parents) have left! TIME TO FINALLY GET STUDYING!
Talk soon! PROMISE.
Thursday, June 10, 2010
Day 751: Brains and shoulders and verification
I shadowed a neurosurgeon yesterday. Can I please express how crazy it is to be two feet away from a guy who is getting his head cut open? The entire procedure took about 4 1/2 hours and it was completely amazing the entire time. Cutting through the scalp, slowing peeling away tissue and muscle. It took us two hours just to get to the skull. Anyway, the whole experience was a little extremely awe-inspiring. Uhhh, I just watched brain surgery. How weird is that to hear?
I noticed something last night. My shoulder started to bleed, wonderful I know, after I removed the gauze from the wound. When I put Neosporin on it (just the bleeding portion), it stung. My arm has been stinging most nights due to the fun things I put on it (Iodine and/or Neosporin), but I didn't think it had anything specifically to do with the Neosporin. Using the knowledge I gained yesterday, I am now putting Vitamin E on it and two things. 1) It no longer sting-stings, just the good ol' skin-is-(re)forming-so-get-used-to-limited-mobility-and-constant-pain. 2)...I didn't actually have a second point. If I did, I forgot it.
Oh, my AMCAS (aka medical school application) was verified yesterday. All I have to do is wait for a letter of good standing from my undergrad (I'm crossing my fingers it won't get screwed up...but we all remember what I said about hoping and wishing and wanting. So. I'm going to stay on top of this and hopefully not get screwed beyond belief. Ha. Good luck with that.)
I noticed something last night. My shoulder started to bleed, wonderful I know, after I removed the gauze from the wound. When I put Neosporin on it (just the bleeding portion), it stung. My arm has been stinging most nights due to the fun things I put on it (Iodine and/or Neosporin), but I didn't think it had anything specifically to do with the Neosporin. Using the knowledge I gained yesterday, I am now putting Vitamin E on it and two things. 1) It no longer sting-stings, just the good ol' skin-is-(re)forming-so-get-used-to-limited-mobility-and-constant-pain. 2)...I didn't actually have a second point. If I did, I forgot it.
Oh, my AMCAS (aka medical school application) was verified yesterday. All I have to do is wait for a letter of good standing from my undergrad (I'm crossing my fingers it won't get screwed up...but we all remember what I said about hoping and wishing and wanting. So. I'm going to stay on top of this and hopefully not get screwed beyond belief. Ha. Good luck with that.)
Sunday, May 16, 2010
Day 726: More shadowing
With the help of my best friend (and her parents), I had the opportunity to shadow a pediatric neurologist. I shadowed him on two occasions. The first was, honestly, a bit boring. It was liking attending a doctor's appoint, except I wasn't the patient. The doctor was still very gracious and kind and the experience was still good overall -- just not what I thought it would be.
The second instance was a better. I mainly shadowed the resident who was super sweet. She talked me through a lot of things and listened to all of my application troubles. The second shadowing was at a degenerative neurological diseases clinic and it was quite sad. Or rather the idea of it. The kids all looked super healthy and like normal kids. Unfortunately, normal won't last very long. Which is just plain depressing to think about.
Overall, the whole experience was fantastic. It gave me more clinical experience, which I think is imperative for my impending applications.
Thank you BFFFH!
The second instance was a better. I mainly shadowed the resident who was super sweet. She talked me through a lot of things and listened to all of my application troubles. The second shadowing was at a degenerative neurological diseases clinic and it was quite sad. Or rather the idea of it. The kids all looked super healthy and like normal kids. Unfortunately, normal won't last very long. Which is just plain depressing to think about.
Overall, the whole experience was fantastic. It gave me more clinical experience, which I think is imperative for my impending applications.
Thank you BFFFH!
Sunday, May 9, 2010
Day 719: Classes, Shadows and Recognition
Classes...
...are o-v-e-r! I am officially done taking classes for medical school. I could probably keep taking courses (more advanced ones to a) show I still want to learn, and b) further improve/maintain my GPA) but I'm going to pass.
...in medical school.
I partook in a child psychiatry rotation at a medical school. It was actually pretty interesting. Apparently, students take tests all the time (shocker) in med school and clinical rotations aren't any different. The doctor teaching the course is a friend-of-a-friend and he is crazyawesome. We have similar personalities and beliefs so we chat very comfortably. Chatting with him actually got me back in the mindset to re-apply and sell, sell, sell (me)!
Shadows...
...aren't always creepy. I shadowed said-child-psychiatrist at his place of work and that was fascinating. The children there are all sorts of different and behaviorally...unstable. It wasn't a bad thing. It was really interesting to see how the environment was structured (meaning a lot of structure) because of the lack of structure (and stability) in the children's lives.
Recognition...
...comes when you least expect it. Long story short, my boss at my internship (Dr. Z) has not disdained my presence as of late and actually told a researcher to make sure he put my name on a manuscript! What?! Oh I know. That's how I felt.
...are o-v-e-r! I am officially done taking classes for medical school. I could probably keep taking courses (more advanced ones to a) show I still want to learn, and b) further improve/maintain my GPA) but I'm going to pass.
...in medical school.
I partook in a child psychiatry rotation at a medical school. It was actually pretty interesting. Apparently, students take tests all the time (shocker) in med school and clinical rotations aren't any different. The doctor teaching the course is a friend-of-a-friend and he is crazyawesome. We have similar personalities and beliefs so we chat very comfortably. Chatting with him actually got me back in the mindset to re-apply and sell, sell, sell (me)!
Shadows...
...aren't always creepy. I shadowed said-child-psychiatrist at his place of work and that was fascinating. The children there are all sorts of different and behaviorally...unstable. It wasn't a bad thing. It was really interesting to see how the environment was structured (meaning a lot of structure) because of the lack of structure (and stability) in the children's lives.
Recognition...
...comes when you least expect it. Long story short, my boss at my internship (Dr. Z) has not disdained my presence as of late and actually told a researcher to make sure he put my name on a manuscript! What?! Oh I know. That's how I felt.
Wednesday, April 7, 2010
Day 687: A trend
As I'm sure some of you have noticed, 2010 has not been my year for blogging. A lot of it has to do with my feelings of ineptitude, which really aren't that big of a deal. I want to thank those of you who took the time out to check in with me and make sure I wasn't in terrible shape. I'm not. I just needed to get those feelings out there (in the blogosphere) so they wouldn't be in here (points to my stomach). I have to make room for food, not feelings :P
Anyway, to be more true to the subtitle of this blog, things that are happening that are med-school related...
Anyway, to be more true to the subtitle of this blog, things that are happening that are med-school related...
- Still interning. Lately there has been a lull in my duties, which was fine when I had exams but is currently not-so-fine now that I'm feeling rather useless in my life.
- With the help of the most amazing best friend in the entire universe, I'm going to shadow a physician in the upcoming month(s).
- I have a new biochem professor who I liken to the devil. She is very different from my first professor (who went and had a baby boy) and not in a good way. She's rather Socratic about her teaching style, asking the students lots of questions and expecting responses, which works for liberal arts subjects but not for science. We're not a chatty class, so I don't enjoy wasting time waiting for someone to answer, then having students guess incorrectly, then have Professor #2 pseudo-admonish us for guessing/not-knowing, then she moves on, and then the entire cycle repeats itself. She's going to be a, pardon my French, hard-ass, which sucks because Professor #1 was the most laid-back professor ever. So, all in all, crappy change.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)