Day 2291: A good reminder

Hello!

This is the shortest update to tell you I am alive (barely) and I had to see my CCT patient today. Long story (or rather, nonexistent story) short, the doctor to whom I presented my case to said to both the patient and myself that I was "a wonderful doctor." He even took the time out to ask me about myself (where I went to undergrad, what specialty I'm interested in), which was really heartening.

Okay. Off to (re)learn more and stuff this brain full!

Day 2279: The end. Wow.

Hey there team.

I am proud to tell you all I have completed my second year of medical school. Can you believe it?! It doesn't have nearly all the fanfare that last year's completion did, but that's probably because this year wasn't as much of a struggle as last year. I learned a lot about myself, personally and academically, in my first year of medical school and I think I was able to use that to my benefit this year. Pathology and microbiology and pharmacology have all come and gone and I'm still standing. Way to go, me.

With that, I leave you with some pictures from my last day of relaxation before it's boardsboardsboardsboardsboardsboardsboardsboards.

Danny treated me to a yummy Sobelman's burger
and "bloody masterpiece" for my M2 year coming to an end!

A butterfly in the Puelicher Butterfly Wing at the
Milwaukee Public Museum (free on Mondays for residents!)

An awesome wall of African art/woodwork at the MPM.

Having crazy beetle adventures with Danny at MPM

I have a lot of great things planned post-boards -- Danny and his family are so kind and wonderful and they are taking me to Disney World! I feel like after taking the most important exam of my life, it really will feel like the Super Bowl so you better believe I will walk out of that testing center saying "I'm going to Disney World!"

After Disney, my family and I will be going to Canada! Banff National Park to be exact. My Mom has always wanted to go and I think it'll be a great time to bond with my mother and sister.

And then I come back for orientation in late June and rotations begin July 1st! This is really happening people. I'm finally going to be in the clinic, where I belong! I can't wait!

I'll talk to you all in June or July!

All my x's and o's!

Day 2270: Sick, dying, and thank you

Hey all,

The quickest post to tell you I am sick. For the third time this year! Apparently it's true, when you are stressed out, you get sick much faster. I am never ever sick. And now I am on icky-feeling-number-three for the year 2013.

I am dying of stress. Not my sickness. My whatever-this-is involves a lot of clogged noses and nose-blowing and somewhat phlegm-y feeling throat. My cumulative final for pathology is on May 9th (!!!) and then my final exam of microbiology is on May 13th. Luckily micro is not cumulative, but still. I'm not terribly stressed about either exam, so much as busy going over the material (the previous seven blocks of path) and learning the new stuff (dermatology, breast, thyroid, etc). The true stress comes from the fact that my board exams are a little more than 5 or 6 weeks away! I'm still on the fence about moving my test date up, but everyone and their mother's brother's niece's dog says that I will either burn out by my current test date (June 17th) or stress myself out so much in that time (aka Jessica will become bald like Homer Simpson -- with three lone strands of hair left), so we'll see.

How sad is my life? I am straight-up excited for finals to be over, not because I have finished another somewhat-hellish year and am heading in to the hospital (!!), but rather my excitement is due to the fact that I can finally dedicate my desired 10-12 hours a day of solely boards studying. Very sad Jessica. Pitiful actually.

Thank you all for your texts and care packages (BEL-C)! I feel so lucky to have people who love and care about me so much. Especially when I have essentially turned my back on everyone to get through the last 5 weeks of pure hell. Thank you. From the bottom of my cold, dead heart. My heart will beat again soon and I will be the friend each of you so deserve.

There might be radio silence until then so I wanted to end it on a positive note. Honestly and truly. Thank you all.

Day 2260: Ups and Downs

My weekend with my sister was glorious -- exactly what I needed, family time. However, the entire time my sister was here, I was stressed out beyond belief; thinking about all the things I should be or could be studying. Nevertheless, we had a helluva time and I love my sister to the moon and back. There are pictures below of our outings. What you don't see is a ton of eating my sister I did -- Cafe Centraal with Danny's family, a yumtastic breakfast/brunch at Danny's parents' home, Milwaukee Public Market -- the whole shebang.

My sister and I at a Brewers game!

My sister and I at Miller Brewery, getting ready for a tour!

Yesterday, Tuesday, was a sh!t-show. I was at school from 8:30am to 11pm, with probably an hour max of relaxation/hanging out on the internet/whatever, and I was so stressed about boards and finals and life that I cried twice (from sheer stress and panic) and called Danny to tell him I probably wouldn't be able to go on vacation with his family this summer (because I was so stressed out about boards). And then, to top it all off, I lost this earring that I just bought for my sister and I as a fun little sister-studs-thing. Sigh. What a bunch of crappy things at once, hey?

Today, I gave a little presentation at our class meeting regarding professional attire. It was (surprisingly) well received by students and staff and, if you have any interest in watching, I included the video below. If you have anything to say about the video, please comment below! I'd love to hear what you thought (good and bad).

All in all, it was a really nice start to the day given how craptastic yesterday (Tuesday) was. Oh. I also got my new iPad 4 (it's for clinic, not for fun...but I'll be using it for fun :P). My iPad 2 will be given to my parents/family in Taiwan so they can FaceTime.

As you can see, it's been a very up-and-down week. Off to study pathology (and everything else, sigh). See ya later alligator!

Day 2255: Extracurriculars galore

As Danny pointed out, apparently, I manage to do things without realizing I'm doing them. What I mean is. I am stressed. Beyond belief. This exam is so incredibly important and all I want is to load my brain up to the matrix and upload all the information I need to annihilate this exam. Instead, I am building my coffee addiction to avoid napping so that I can push through and learn.

Anyway, what was the point of this post? As you can see, I'm losing my mind. Oh yes. So, I ran for three positions on Student Assembly/school stuff and won two! Wowza, I know. I didn't think I would win, much less have people congratulate me (either in person or via text/email). The positions I will be holding next year are: Admissions Committee Representative (for my class) and track liaison. Admissions Committee is talking about and discussing admissions stuff with deans and whatnot. Track liaison is representing the sixteen other people in my rotations track to discuss any issues we have (with clerkship directors, residents, too many hours, etc) with deans.

I'm also doing a clinical continuity thing I told you all about in this post. So, I will be the primary caregiver of a patient with long-term medical issues. I'll be meeting my patient tomorrow morning for the first time.

I think that's it? I'm still going to do the politics/WMS thing for continuity's sake. And maybe the resolutions will be more interesting next year. And, I will most likely be interviewing med school applicants next year. Anything else? No. Oh yes. I will be doing some urology research next year to boost my urology application for the year after that. Oh. And I was on a committee this year to review student organizations to make sure they were following the guidelines to actually be an organization.

Dear sweet baby Jesus. Typing out what I'm doing makes me a) seem like I do more than I really do and b) is actually exhausting to think about.

My brain hurts.

Day 2254: Madison, practice boards and life

Hello everyone!

I am taking a little break from my sleepless life to tell you about said sleeplessness, ha.

My only picture of the Capitol.

This past weekend, I was in Madison for the Wisconsin Medical Society. And I have to tell you. Politics leaves a very bad taste in my mouth. During the "ref comms" (reference committees), I was surprised to see that physicians didn't use facts or experiences to determine why they, personally, disagreed with certain resolutions but it actually came down to "I don't want to do this, so I won't." I wasn't terribly passionate about anything (when am I passionate about anything that isn't enhancing my wardrobe?) but there was one resolution I cared about -- death with dignity. A female ENT (ear, nose, throat) physician has been trying for years to get a physician-assisted suicide resolution, similar to the one in Oregon, passed here in Wisconsin. I don't get what the fuss is about. Physicians are concerned about the possible avenues this could lead to (depressed people asking for fatal doses of drugs, etc) but I feel that since we never asked to be brought in to this world, the least we could provide ourselves is a way to leave it. And if it could be a little less painful and dramatic than a handful of whatever pills you can find or, worse, a gun to the head, I think we as physicians should be able to provide people with terminal, fatal illnesses that option. Do any of you have opinions you would like to share on death with dignity/physician-assisted suicide? Disagreements are welcome!

There was a Pokemon convention below our medical one.
Obviously I enjoyed this one wayyyy more.

Okay. Politics done. Yesterday, Wednesday April 17th, I took a four-hour practice Step 1/boards exam. It was fine. We don't get our scores for a few weeks so it's hard to gauge how it was. Some of the questions were more direct than I have seen (which is good), but it was still a lot of "dammit. I have seen this before and have narrowed down the choices but still don't know which one is right!" So, we'll see. I am shooting for passing (180) but at least a 200. (The national average is 225 and I will be getting a 240 to be able to coast into urology.)

Life. I went to a SF Giants versus Milwaukee Brewers game last night with some classmates to unwind from the four-hour exam. The Giants lost at the bottom of the 9th and everyone around me was surprisingly gracious about their loss. They were pumped the Brewers won, of course, but they did say "Sorry about your Giants" which was nice. They meaning everyone except Danny haha.

Let's go Giants!

Homemade Giants fan (my scarf made me way too hot so I made
it in to a turban, haha).

Our view from the field. Brewers player Aoki on the bottom left,
and Giants player Pence on the bottom right.

Consolation fries and custard at Kopp's after the game.

My sister comes to visit tomorrow/Friday! I couldn't be more excited to see family. I love my sister to pieces of death and GAH! Can't wait! She is, of course, the best sister on the planet and said "you know you have to study while I'm there right?" What a thoughtful one she is!

Okay, I'm going to listen to a few more boards-prep lectures and then shadow a urologist (my last time this year before finals/boards/rotations!). Then, more boards-prep and then I have to head to DSW to buy a pair of shoes for Sandy's wedding in July! So much to do!

Day 2248: I'm not a nurse

Let me clear the air, I have zero problem with nurses. What I do have a problem with is every graying-at-the-temples-white-male (and the ever so often female) asking me if I'm in school to be a nurse. No, I'm not. Do you exist in life to be sexist and close-minded?

Yesterday, I met up with an M3 at Starbucks to discuss our patient's transition. I volunteered to be a part of the Saturday Free Clinic's Clinical Continuity Track (CCT), a program that pairs an M3/M4 with a patient with chronic health problems (diabetes, high blood pressure, obesity, etc) in order to help manage that patient's care. Well, the gentleman behind us says "Whoa! Are you girls nurses?" First of all, are you eavesdropping? Second of all, no. I'm going to a doctor.

This will be the third time this has happened to me in two years. This is easily replacing how often I get asked "how old are you? You look so young!" (Which, to clarify, has never happened to me once in medical school. I carry myself way too confidently to be even considered a youngun. That don't mean I got an old face though!)